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The Three Witches


Inspired by Caoie of Maui, HI

CAST:
Witch 1
Witch 2
Witch 3
Cowgirl
Vet
Janitor
PROPS/COSTUMES:
Large cauldron on a platform (ala Mary Poppins's bag) with a hole in the bottom; leafless trees; moon; dirty gym sock; cowboy boots with tacky sequins; plastic log; mosquito net; toy stuffed cat; miniature dollhouse door; big plastic ring; plastic frog; king-like wig; broom; plastic owl; handful of sand; scoop; glitter in a tube; plastic instruments (for girl band). Costumes: 3 witch dresses; three girl band outfits; cowgirl; vet; janitor.

(Three wanna-be witches are standing over a bubbling cauldron filled with a mysterious brew. The setting is TRYING to be ominous, but isn't quite convincing.)

Witch 1 :
We are gathered here today to find out which witch is witchiest!

Witch 2 :
Together we will make witchy things!

Witch 3 :
Yesss! And we WILL be scary! Haah hah ha! Let us begin!

(The Witches laugh and gather over the cauldron and start waving their hands over the concoction. They hope to make something sinister!)

All Three Witches:
Shiny like the moon, fluffy like a chick, make this potion, very quick!

Witch 1:
Smelly sock...

(Adds smelly gym sock to cauldron.)

Witch 2 :
Owl's hoots...

(Make hooting noises into the cauldron and throws in a toy owl.)

Witch 3 :
Turn this potion into...boots?!!

(The Witches pull some tacky cowboy boots out of the cauldron.)

Witch 1 :
What are these?!

Witch 2 :
Boots aren't very witchy!

Witch 3 :
We MUST have done something wrong.

(The Witches start to investigate the cauldron, when suddenly a Cowgirl pops out of it.)

Cowgirl:
Howdy!!!

(The Witches are frightened.)

All Three Witches:
AUGGHHHH!

Cowgirl:
Hey gals, don't be afraid! You just have my trusty boots! I'll just grab them and get right out of your way.

(The Cowgirl takes back her boots and ducks back into the cauldron. The Witches are embarrassed.)

Witch 1:
We're not being particularly scary.

Witch 2 :
Or witchy.

Witch 3 :
Hold on, hold on, girls, I know we can do this. C'mon, let's try again. Let's make...a black cat!

(The Witches nod in agreement and support.)

All Three Witches:
Good idea! Alright! Sounds good, yes, very scary, etc.

(The Witches laugh, attempt to be scary, and gather over the cauldron and start waving their hands over the concoction. They add ingredients to the pot and once again try to make something sinister.)

Witch 1:
Bark of log...

(Adds log.)

Witch 2:
Mosquito net...

(Adds mosquito net.)

Witch 3:
Turn this mixture into...

(A Vet pops up with a cat.)

Witch 1:
A vet?!

(Shrinking back in fear.)

All Three Witches:
OHHHH!

Vet:
Don't worry, I'm just a friendly vegetarian, I mean, a veterinarian. Sorry, I always get those two confused.

(To cat.)

Oh, so precious! They're sweet widdle witchies, yes they are!

(The Witches look upset.)

Witch 2:
Hey, we aren't sweet, widdle witchies! We're nasty witches, right girls?

Witches 1 & 3:
Yeah! Right! Etc.

Vet:
Well, excuse me.

(To cat.)

Let's go, my precious widdle kitty. These witches are a widdle confused!

Witch 1 :
Did you hear what he just said?

Witch 2 :
This isn't going well at all. We made a cat DOCTOR instead of a cat!

Witch 3:
C'mon! We can do this! Don't listen to that vegetarian, I mean, veterinarian! We can be scary witches! Why don't we make... umm...

Witch 1:
A broom! We'll make a witch's broom!

Witches 2 & 3:
(The other Witches nod eagerly.)

Okay, a broom, that's easy. We can make a broom, etc.

(The Witches laugh, attempt to be scary, and gather over the cauldron and start waving their hands over the concoction. They add ingredients to the pot and are determined to make a broom.)

Witch 1:
Wood of door and wacky ring,

(Add a miniature door and plastic ring.)

Plastic frog and wig of king,

(Add plastic frog and king-like wig.)

Witch 2 :
Scoop of sand from mummy's tomb,

(Adds scoop of sand to cauldron.)

Witch 3 :
Turn this potion into...

(Pulls out a broom.)

All Three Witches:
A BROOM!!!

(The Witches are ecstatic because the potion worked! They give each other high-fives.)

Witch 1:
Yes!!

Witch 2:
It finally worked!!

Witch 3:
Ha haa! Go us! Go us! Go us!

(Suddenly a Janitor comes out of the cauldron. The Witches scream.)

All Three Witches:
AUUGGHHHHHH!

Janitor:
Hey, thanks guys! I've been looking everywhere for that!

(The Janitor takes back the broom and ducks back into the cauldron.)

Witch 1:
This stinks! I quit!

Witch 2:
Me too!

Witch 3:
Me three. Let's ditch this witch thing. Why don't we try turning into...

Witch 1:
Rock stars!

Witch 2:
Yea!

Witch 3:
All the music from across the land...

All Three Witches:
A girl band!

(The WITCHES are transformed into a girl band.)

(The former Witches and current Band Members rock out.)


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