Providing child care means much more than providing a clean and safe place for children to play or giving them nutritious meals and snacks. The most important things that a child care provider gives to children are love, support, understanding, comfort, discipline, an excitement in their growing abilities, a healthy curiosity about their world, an eagerness to learn, and the belief that they are valuable and that life is worth the effort to live.

A Different Kind of Caring

These are, of course, the same kinds of things that healthy parents try to give to their children; but the child care provider will offer them differently than the parent does at home. That, naturally, is because each person is different -- was born different, grew differently and with different kinds of care that now shape the kind of care they give as adults. A parent, for instance, may have given up insisting on an afternoon nap for a child at home, but a child care provider may make quiet time a regular part of the daily schedule for all the children in his or her care. Parents and providers often find it helpful to talk about how their ways of giving care are different. While trying to work in partnership, each partner needs to respect the differences in the other.

Making a Difference

Fred Rogers understood the challenges of people who work with young children, and he offered this inspiring message during a keynote address at the NAEYC (National Association for the Education of Young Children) Conference one year.

"Do you ever wonder if you've made a difference in this life? Whether any of those children who have come to your care have remembered anything you did for them -- any ways you cared for them? I believe that by the time a child grows up, that child's first teacher and second teacher and all the child's important adults will have become incorporated into that child's development. That's the way it is with all children and, although they might not remember clearly, those of us who were the educators of their early lives will always be a part of who they are. Just like those who meant so much to us when we were children will always be a part of who we are."

• It's important for caregivers and parents to develop a partnership -- a connection -- with one another. The healthier the relationship is between parent and caregiver, the easier the caring situation becomes for the child.
• Part of growing is learning to cope with the strong feelings when a parent goes away. Sadness is one of those emotions, and that's the one we generally associate with partings. The other strong feeling at being left is anger. That one is not so often recognized or acknowledged. Sometimes children even hold on to that anger and express it when their parents come back.
• All through our lives we deal with separations. The caring help you give children everyday with those experiences will help them with the many comings and goings they will face throughout their lives.

When you encourage children to talk about whatever they're feeling...and to find positive outlets for their anger, you are building a caring and trusting bond with them...and with their parents.

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