Children can have very special relationships with pets -- a trusted friend who gives unconditional love, a companion when no one else will play, a smaller creature whom they have some control over, a comforter on difficult days. A pet can help children learn about discipline and responsibility... about birth and even death.

Challenges of Caring for a Pet

Of course, young children aren't able to handle much of the responsibility that's involved in caring for a pet. They even have to be reminded of their own self-care routines, like washing their hands before eating or brushing their teeth before going to bed. It is possible, though, that through time, a pet can help a child begin to learn to be a responsible caregiver.

We also can't expect young children to be gentle and caring with a pet. At first, to children, a pet is like a toy. Out of curiosity they might hold the pet upside down, lift a floppy ear to see what's underneath, step on a tail, or try to ride a dog like a pony. Preschoolers don't see things from someone else's point of view. They don't even realize that a pet is a living creature.

Learning to Respect Animals

Some young children might think that there's a little person inside the pet -- and treat it as such instead of like an animal. Animals are often given human qualities in children's books, television, movies, and puppetry -- where they sometimes talk, wear clothes, and even sing and dance! In fact, it's often through stuffed animals and picture books that the relationship between children and animals begins. But children soon find that real animals wiggle out of the baby carriage and won't tolerate being dressed up in doll clothes. That's when children learn that a pet is a living creature, to be treated like all other living creatures -- with gentleness, caring, and respect.

Sharing Responsibility

Grown-ups must be partners with children in sharing the work of feeding, caring for, and cleaning up after a pet. We adults need to make sure we don't let children get overburdened by a responsibility they may not be ready for yet.

Adults need to help protect pets, too. Young children can't be expected to know what to do about beaks and claws and teeth, and animals can't be expected to know what to do about hair pulling and squeezing.

What Children Can Learn from a Pet

When we explain about the limits we make for pets, such as where it's okay to play and not, children can better understand why we make limits for them as well -- for health, safety, and for having some order at child care. When pets ignore those limits, children see adults' reactions -- scolding and making restrictions. At times like that, children seem to be growing in their understanding that limits are expressions of caring and affection.

No one can really predict exactly what changes will take place if a pet joins your classroom, but it's fairly certain that changes will occur -- some of them pleasant and others not so pleasant. While pets generally add more complications, they also add an enriching dimension to the many layers of caring and confirmation of life.

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