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How do you deal with it when your friends peer pressure you?
--From Ashley, 13

We got so many answers to this question that we ran out of room! Take a look at what others had to say, and send us your response on other topics.


Other "You Said It"
Topics in Friends:

“When I'm being peer pressured, I tell them God is watching over me and he would want me to do what is right.”
--Amy, 13

“My friends try to pressure me into cutting class all the time and I tell them I'm going to class and that they do not need me to cut class. One thing you need to know about peer pressure is that if they are pressuring you to do something bad, they don't care about what happens to you. They are all about themselves.”
--Leasia, 12

“I remind myself that I'm my own person and if I don't want to do it then I shouldn't!”
--Rosana, 13

“I try to ignore it and try to help them when they do that.”
--Devondria, 10

“There are these 2 bullies that pick on me saying, ‘You are such a know-it-all.’ But I just ignore them and tell them, ‘If you don't stop, I will tell on you,’ and that always works.”
--Sana, 10

“I have a lot of friends that make fun of me.”

“I ignore it and I go find something else to do!”
--Kathy, 11

“Think ahead: what will help you be what you want to be? Being an individual is hard, but empowering.”

“I go to my police officer at school and tell him about my problems with other kids. Also, I speak to my mom about pressure because she loves me a lot!”

“I tell my friends, 'I don't want to do that' or 'If you want someone to do it, you do it.’”
--Bits, 9

"I just explain to them the truth. I don't watch the naked parts in the movies, and I don't listen to regular music. I listen to Christian Rap, Christian Rock, and Christian Pop rather than without the adjective ‘Christian.’ If they don't understand, it is their own fault. I listen to Christian music because I am to be a Pastor, and I need not be swayed! I must try to live a pure life. I still have fun! I watch Anime, The Matrix, and all movies, just not the naked parts. I listen to HEAVY METAL Christian music, like Pillar, and rap like KJ52, Toby Mac, and all. I listen to Christian Country like Third Day, etc!I am never put down in peer pressure! LOL cya! Thanks!"

"I have had a few people tell me to do something stupid or something I didn't feel comfortable doing. All you have to do is say, 'No I am NOT doing that!' Sometimes they will say something like, 'Then just leave.' If that does happen, they think that doing that will get what they want and they aren't real friends. A real friend would understand and respect your feelings."
--Olivia, 12

“Hey, I'm in middle school and last year the pressure just got even worse. To add on to that, my friends from last year all went to high school. I was the one to hang with all the older kids and now I'm the Pig Ogre or Bigfoot. I'm 5'11'' and 190 and everyone thinks that I’m a big girl but it's not that I’m tall and not skinny. I’m BIG! I’m up to a 14 size in pants and L shirts. When all these rumors started about me, I hated life. I don’t even go out of the house. That was last week. This week is much better. I figured out who the rumors came from and I talked to them and I came to figure out that it was my ex-friend. She was just jealous that I have new friends.”
--Samantha, 13

Peer pressure is horrible. You should always stand up for what you think is right for you. If your friends say that if you don't do something, they wont be your friends, they're not true friends at all! They were just fake to get something from you. = ["
--Salena, 12

"My friends don't put peer pressure on me, they're too caring for that. They are used to a boy in my class named Parker (he moved). He was big and a bully and pressured everyone. He also called everyone this name which means half man, half woman. He called me it once and I blew up in his face. He definitely stopped after that!"
--Brenna, 12

“There was this new kid at our school and his name was Brian. He lived with a BAD foster family. His life was bad and he did drugs to try to make it go away. Every time I tried to talk to him about it he didn’t listen. So one day after school I talked to him alone. I explained that doing drugs is just gonna make your life worse. He listened to me and stopped for a few weeks. Then he found out he was gonna move again for the like 2342348238th time and he started again. Anyway I am a very stubborn person and I keep with my beliefs, opinions, etc. I can’t imagine my friends offering me a hit, and if they did, I would look at them like they were crazy and walk away. It may be hard because the 'cool person' is there, but dude, drugs just aren’t cool. If you are doing drugs because you think your life stinks and you think you have SO many problems, drugs are just gonna give you a bigger one.”
--Rachel (llama), 13

“Nobody has ever put peer pressure on me, but about 2 years ago my sister had a boyfriend named Rob and he was a year younger then her, but still in her grade. She was on vacation with his family and his mom, dad, sisters, and little brother went down to the beach and Rob tried to make out with her. The next day they broke up.”
--Devin, 9

“None of my friends pressure me into doing things like drugs and stuff. But if someone ever tries to pressure me into doing drugs, I would probably ask for help from someone (like my bffs) cuz I can trust my trustworthy friends.”
--Britt, 12

"One time my friend tried to get me to smoke weed with him (it was a long time ago, he doesn't do it anymore). I told him that I don't do that stuff and I don't want to try it. I also told him that I won't be his friend if he keeps doing it and he stopped for me."

"With peer pressure the only thing you have to remember is you can always say no. So don't feel you have to give into it because you don't."
--Michael, 10

"Not so good but I think it's time I stand up to them. What should I do?"
--Pat, 13

"I would be mad because why should they pressure me into doing something they want to do?"
--Kristin, 13

"WOW! Peer pressure. Something I wouldn't even think about. If friends tell you to do something you don't want to do (smoke, drugs, etc.) you should not be friends with them. Everybody deals with peer pressure at sometime in their life. I deal with it simply by saying NO! and walking away."
--Fazilla, 12

"I got really, really mad and now because of the rumor everybody thinks I'm rude and mean. Now nobody wants to be my partner when we need one and it's because of this girl Eva. She makes stuff seem like a bigger deal than it really is."
--Vanessa, 10

"At my school, all the popular kids in my year swear and wear lots of makeup and get into trouble. I used to think to be cool I had to be like them, but you don't! Being cool is about being yourself, being a good friend, standing up for yourself, and not letting other people push you into things."
--Olivia, 12

"It really bugs me. Sometimes I'm pressured to not be myself. One friend of mine thinks I'm 'too aggressive' and he pressures me to be calmer. Sometimes I go along with it, but I always stop at one point."
--Daniel, 12

"When my friends peer pressure me into things I try to stop and think about what I'm going to do. I also try to ignore it."
--Duchana, 11

"If my friends ever tried to peer pressure me, I'd tell them off really quick. And if they didn't stop, I'd tell them off again. I doubt my friends would continue if they knew it was bugging me. I only have two friends and we've been friends for a long time. No need to worry about what they think of me or them pressuring me to do anything stupid because we have the same views on stupid things, like thinking drugs are pointless. The smaller things would cease to be a problem as soon as I pointed out that it was one. Friends who purposely peer pressure you into doing something hardly seems a friend at all."

"I used to belong to a Boy Scouts group where 2 boys swore and made fun of other kids a lot. When I first joined the group, the 2 boys met me and tried to drag me into it. At the same time I had also just started going to church and I had met a kid who got made fun of a lot. He told me how kids picked on him and pushed him around. Then I saw how it made the kids feel to be made fun of. At the next scout meeting I told the boys I did not want to be a part of what they were doing. They would not talk to me anymore but it did not matter because I knew I did the right thing."
--DJ, 11

"I hate it how at school, in order to be popular, you have to look a certain way. In my school you are not popular unless you wear hip-huggers, tight shirts, and these certain sneakers that are really popular right now. I mean, you have to be perfect right down to how your hair is. I don't like it."
--Rachelle, 13

"My friends all wanted me to go out with this guy even though I am not allowed to date so I said yes. I never went out with him but I did get in big trouble so it's hard, but just learn to say no. Oh, and don't keep a diary where your parents can find it and read that you are going out with a guy."
--Ashley, 13

"I'm a P.K. (pastor’s kid) and I know it's really hard to deal with it. They swear sometimes and try to drag me into it. When I don't. They call me a wimp but I don't let it bother me. The best thing to do about peer pressure from friends is to ignore them and make new friends that respect you even when you don't want to do something they want to do."
--Leah, 11

“It's hard to say no when your ‘friends’ pressure you about smoking, drugs, etc. because you do not want to feel embarrassed.”

“Some of my friends are peer pressuring me to go out with this boy.”
--Alivia, 11

"If there is peer pressure on me and I know I shouldn't be doing that, I just stand up for myself so I know that I am doing something right. If one of your friends is doing something wrong and you know it, maybe you should not be friends with that person."
--Marie, 13

"Just tell them to get away... nicely!"
--Burgess, 12

“My friends love me and we're family so they don't pressure me. If I feel pressured, I tell them!”
--Jaimie, 12

“First of all if they were really your friends, they wouldn't pressure you to do something you don't want to do. Second, speak out. Tell your friends you don't want to do it! Stand up for yourself. I hope this will help u!”
--Kelly, 13

“I just say no. My friends understand me. They know what I am like. I have been pressured into smoking, egging someone's house on Devil's night, breaking into a chicken coop, yelling at the teacher and other stuff. I have also been pressured to dump my boyfriend Connor. I told the people that I didn't want to because I really like him. They understood. I have been going out with him for almost two months.”
--Em, 12

"Peer pressure is tempting. I HATE it when people give reasons. All you do is tell them no and if they plead further you say, NO!! STOP!! After that you just tell someone."

"I hate it when your friends try to make you do something that you don't want to do or even your own step-sister."
--Macie, 12

“They're not my friends but some girls at school tease me. They're taunting me just to get my interests off of spiders, vampire bats, and lots of other grim stuff. Guess what? They also gave me a nickname for that. They call me ‘Serial Killer.’ You'd think that they'd at least be creative! I deal with that by saying to them, ‘Well hey, at least I'm not boring. As boring as you guys.’ It seems peer pressure comes more from girls than boys and not just for me. Why is that?”
--Lindsay, 11

“I would tell them you can do it but I won't because you’re not the boss of ME!!!”
--Amber, 10

“Maybe they aren't really your friends but anyway, if they are, tell them how you feel. Hang in there!”
--Jamie, 12

“When girls from the ‘popular group’ would peer pressure me, I would just say no. The girls would keep at it but I would ignore them. It's hard to say no when the popular kids try to make you to do things, but if you try hard to reject their offers, eventually they'll stop bugging you.”
--Laura, 13

“When I was in 6th Grade my friends peer pressured me. They treated me like a 5-year-old and they told me what to do. I was like, "I’VE HAD ENOUGH SO WHY DON'T YOU GUYS SHUT UP!’ We all fought and I peer pressured them back. Sometimes you can do that. I did, but that's when I was younger.”

“My friends often put peer pressure on me. They always do stupid things like stealing someone's basketball and running away with it, and are always trying to get me to join them. I'll often say things like, 'That's so stupid and childish, why do something so stupid?' and they'll say, 'But it's fun!'. I respond to that by saying, 'It really makes you look stupid’ or ‘Don't you have any dignity?'. Now they've stopped because of me!!! Now they're real friends!”
--Leigh, 12

“All my friends said that I should dump my ex-boyfriend and go out with the boyfriend I am now going out with. All I did was listen to them because they knew it was best for me and I have been going out with Kevin for over 2 months!”
--Xia, 11

"When my friends use peer pressure to make me do something, I just say no. If they get mad about it, they'll just have to deal with it, because friends shouldn't be doing that to each other anyway."
--Tess, 12

“My friends once peer pressured me into playing a card game and reading a book series. It was fun. I'm not sure if this counts as peer pressure, because I had no problem with doing those things and they weren't mean or obnoxious about it.”
--Samantha, 12

“Okay, first of all, your so-called 'friends' aren't really friends at all, so stop hanging around with them. I don't have friends who pressure me because I have GREAT friends. I see us all as friends here on this website because we never criticize each other and try to help each other. So for you who my advice applies to, I hope you'll listen. Even if you’re a loner after that, it's worth it.”
--Len, 12

“It’s so bad where I live. There are three major groups that fight: the druggies, the straight-edgers and the punkers. Luckily I'm friends with everyone, so they don’t mess with me. Once they ganged up on me but I was okay.”

“I stopped being their friend for a while.”
--Stacey, 11

“My best friend has another friend who I don't really like and she really wants me to like her better.”
--Eloise, 10

“All my friends tried to get me to be mean to another friend by not talking to her and pushing her and things like that. I said that I didn't want to, so they said that if I didn't they wouldn't be my friend anymore. So I said fine and went with another group of friends who didn't make me do things I didn't want to do. After I did that, my other friends said that they were sorry and things were ok. They also started to understand when I didn't want to do something.”
--Stephanie, 11

“I just walk away.”

“I feel that it's so hard to answer or do whatever they are pressuring me to do. Sometimes I just don't do it and tell them no and let it be.”
--Tiffany, 12

“I would just say no or no thanks and just walk off!!!!”
--Cieria, 12

“My friend Hannah is always trying to peer pressure me into kissing her younger brother because he likes me!!! She tells me it would make him feel better!!! I keep saying no and I haven’t gone over there since!!!”
--Rachel, 10

“I feel peer pressured when my friends tell me to raise my hand for an answer that I know is wrong.”
--Angelica, 12

“I just say, ’Hey dawg, get away’ and they normally stop!”
--Kurtis, 12

“Me and my friend got in a fight yesterday and she was bullying me around. I wrote her a note saying sorry for what I did to make her bully me around because she never bullies me around like she did yesterday.”
--Mariah, 9

“My friend is always trying to pressure me into lying to my mom & dad. When I say no, she just forgets about it then does it again the next day. I'm sticking with her, at least until 7th grade 'cause until then, she's all I got!! Friends that peer pressure you aren't really your friends. That's how I see it.”
--Rubea, 12

“When my friends peer pressure me, I usually don’t pay much attention to them. If it is something bad, it usually doesn’t even end up happening!”
--Kickapoo, 12

“Peer pressure is really hard to deal with. Some people think things like: ‘If I don't do this, they're gonna think I'm a wimp or something.’ Peer pressure happened to me once in kindergarten (I know, it's weird). I got in big trouble for what my ‘friend’ told me to do. After that, I learned that you can't just do things because your friends think it's cool. It's a bad thing. When your friends try to peer pressure you to do something that you think isn't right, don't do it. If you have a conscience, listen to it. Your brain is more reliable than theirs. Do what you think is right; not what somebody else thinks. That's all I'm saying. Peace out!”
--Tyler, 11

“I know my friends are really my friends because they never pressure me. I'd just tell them I wouldn't do it, and that if this is what it means to be friends with them, maybe we weren't friends.”
--Megan, 11

“When my friends peer pressure me, I try to be nice or just stay away.”
--Jill, 10

“I think that if your friends are really your friends, they will not pressure you to do anything you don't want to do. If you think they are your friends and they are pressuring you, then maybe you need to hang out with a different crowd.”
--Kate, 12

"I just glare at them and walk away."
--Corinne, 9

"When my friends peer pressure me, I just walk away until they cool down!"
--Nicole, 11

"If they get mad at you, they'll get over it. Do what YOU know is right. If your so-called 'friends' are putting you under pressure, maybe they're not your real friends!"
--Kaitlin, 12

"Well, I just say no to what ever they want me to do and then in the end I find that they respect me more."

"My dad goes to a seminar every week that shows how to deal with people and howpeople act and stuff. Well first of all, they're not really your friends if they peer pressure you to do something bad all the time. Whenever my 'friends' peer pressure me, I just walk away and don't listen to them. If they get mad at you (which has happened to me a lot) there's plenty more fish in the sea. You don't need the kind of friends that pressure you to do something. That's not what friendsdo."
--Tyler, 11

"Well, you know if they are really your friends when if you say you don't want to and that's alright with them!"
--Michelle, 12

"I just tell them how I really feel and if they don't like me for who I am, then that's their loss, not mine."

"When my friend starts peer pressuring me, I usually go away and the next day I say nothing to her."
--Tatiana, 11

"Good friends would not pressure you."
--Delaney, 9

"That happened to me the other day. I was sitting at a table eating a family dinner with one of my friends (who is really shy) when another friend ran in and asked me why I wasn't eating with her. I told her that I was eating here and did she have a problem with that. She left me alone, but she's still my friend."
--Zaphoid, 12

"Peer pressure is getting worse and worse as time passes, and kids our age really need to stick up for what we think is the right thing to do. NOT what we think another person is thinking. Just say 'NO!' Yeah, it'll take guts but everyone's got them, so use them!!!!"
--Serah, 13

"I tell them that I like what I like and I don't really care what you think about it. I've always been bothered with peer pressure because I was never 'cool'. Stick with what you like."

"When my friends peer pressure me, I feel like they don't want me to hang out with them. They are all going to have a fight because me. I even think, do my friends really want me around?"

"I just wiggle my way out of it."
--Safiya, 8

"Don't put up with peer pressure. If your friends were good friends, they wouldn't pressure you about anything that would make you feel uncomfortable! Go to Dare.com if it is about drugs. Remember, HUGS NOT DRUGS!"
--Kira, 12

"Peer pressure is just stupid. If you like a person, instead of changing your whole personality for one little thing, you should have the guts to stand up and talk to the person. Say that you like him or her, that's all! It's an easier way, instead of doing something you have no apparent reason for!"
--Megan, 10

"It really upsets me when my friends do that. I just confront them, but if that doesn't work try talking to your counselor. That should take care of it."
--Summer, 11

"If your friends are pressuring you into doing things you don't want to do, then they aren't really your friends. I know it must sound lame or upsetting but it really is true."
--Sio, 12

"You should stay away from doing drugs, even if your friend tries to convince you. You should say, 'No way, I don't want to be having pain, it can kill me'. Try to convince them into doing something else."
--Tracey, 11

I just say no. And make up an excuse like, 'I'm trying to quit' or 'No way, that stuff is nasty', or ignore them and tell someone."
--Lauren, 13

"I was walking in the hall at school when I saw a girl named Alex and my friend kept pressuring me to talk to her."

"When it comes to your friends pressuring you, try to ignore it. Make your decision the first time and NEVER change or your friends will win. It's simply just say no or yes depending on what the question is. Good Luck!"
--Megan, 13

"When girls peer pressure me I didn't know what to do. I thought about it for 30 seconds and then I said no, but they keep asking me if I wanted to smoke. "
--Kayla, 10

"I just have to stand up for what I believe in. You can't let anyone push you around. Not even friends. If you know or think something's wrong, you should never do it no matter what. Remember your friends are under pressure too. Just be an example to them and remember what is right and always do it."
--Constance, 13

"When your friends pressure you to do something you don't want to do, most of the time parents say to try to 'change the subject'. WHY CHANGE THE SUBJECT? They're just going to do it again!!!! So, if your friends pressure you to do something you don't want to do, that is an obvious signal that they aren't your real friends at all."
--Melissa, 13

"Tell them to get away and don't hang out with them anymore. A true friend wouldn't put you in that position!!"
--Morgan, 12

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