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When Friends Fight

What types of things do you and your friends fight about? How do you work things out?

Here's what other kids had to say:

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Other "You Said It"
Topics in Friends:
"Me and my friend always fight. But, when a friend pushes it to the point where you can't handle it, it's time to move on, there's no friendship there."
--Steven, 13

"Me and my friends usually get in a fight about who's older or better, or who apologizes first! Later we always apologize!!!"
--Tessa, 10

"Me and my friend Erin fight over who's the best or more popular. We're mad at each other for at least a day, and then we both get tired of it, and one of us says sorry, because we know we're best friends, and that nothing can change it. There's no use in being mad at each other over such stupid things!"
--Ashley, 12

"My problem is that my friend, Abby, always wants to be with Nandini, and me and Nandini want to play by ourselves."
--Kristin, 13

"What should I do when a person thinks you're their friend, but you're not?"
--Sarah, 12

"My best friend and I fight about, like, how we are going to be like, or who likes who -- things like that."
--Hannah, 10

"She said that I go out with the boy she likes, because he's with me all the time, and he gave me a ring, and said he loves me."
--Denetra, 11

"Me and my friend almost always get in fights, and when we get in fights we get smart with each other. But, 15 mins. after, we stop and walk away. We get mad at each other, but we make up, and we try not to fight again, but we do it again anyway, I don't know why though."
--Kristina, 9

"My friend always asks me if she's my best friend. I always say no to my friends, because I have so many friends that I can't make up my mind. So she got mad at me, and called her mom to pick her up. She wasn't my friend until summer."
--Krista, 10

"All I want to know is, if you are friends with someone, and they are friends with someone you don't like, and who doesn't like you, what do you do? I can't get along with this girl, and my best friend is friends with her. I try to make friends with her, but I am so confused, because one day she is friends with me, and another day she hates me. I just don't know what to do."
--Vanessa, 10

"Some of my friends and I always fight about them talking behind my back , or used to. The best way to deal is to just be honest with them. If they really want to be your friend, then they will stop. In my case, we came to middle school, and I saw the real side of them. Obviously, they kept doing it, and everybody realized that that was how they were. Starting out being the ringleader of the most popular group in school, they ended up having no friends at all. That just shows for all of you out there who do that. STOP!!! It doesn't work. For me, I'm the happiest I've been in a long time, knowing that I don't have to worry about them."
--Kayla, 12

"Both of my friends hate each other, every day a different fight! What do I do?"
--Reba, 10

"We fight about what game we want to play!"
--Tara, 11

"We fight about who should go out with who, and we never get along with each other's opinions and attitudes. We solve our disputes by saying that we're not perfect, and that we are supposed to be different then each other. That's what makes us great friends, because we're different."

"When I fight with my friends, I try to figure out what happened and why it happened. Or, I'll apologize. That's the easiest strategy."
--Rose, 13

"We fight over boys and boyfriends. I told her they just got in the way, and we got in a fight."
--Angel, 13

"Well, my friend is so rude. She lies to me all the time. She said that I was ugly, and I'm sick of it. I don't know how to tell her, I need some help. How can I tell her?"
--Shannon, 12

"We got in a big fight at a pool party, saying bad stuff, like, 'I wish you would drown,' and stuff, and 'You're taking my friends away from me, I'm not always going to hang around you, jerk.' Then we ignored each other for the summer. But, I want to be her friend again, but my mom said NO."
--Robyn, 11

"My friend lies way too much, and I don't know if I should trust her or not. And now, it's hard to believe her about things. When I think she's lying, I get really mad. I've told her that I thought she was lying, and she said that she doesn't lie. But I still don't believe her."
--Amy, 9

"One time, me and my friend, Tonya, got in a fight about who looks the best. This boy, named Adrian, said she did because he liked me, and I didn't like him, and his sister said Tonya, because Adrian told her to. So, I got mad and went home. The next day, I ignored her, and then she got mad. So I was feeling lonely, and everybody told me that she was feeling lonely too, and that she was very sorry, and I said that I want to hear her say she's very sorry herself, and I also told them that I didn't believe them. So, she came and said she was very sorry, and I said I was very sorry. And we went back to being best friends at the end."
--Diamond, 9

"In 4th grade, 3 girls in my class thought they were better than everyone. They said they liked me, but I could tell they didn't, because they called my best friend & I the GEEK CLUB. I never forgave them."
--Kristin, 10

"Well, me and my friend, we are like best buddies, but the problem is, she lies about everything, and I can't even tell her a secret because she will tell everybody. We can't even work things out, so please help me."
--Amanda, 11

"Well, my friend Shannon said that I say my R's wrong, but she's wrong, my mom and dad say it's not wrong, and my sisters say that she's wrong too. And all of the other children say, 'You don't say your R's wrong.' My mom tells me she just picks on me because I'm too cute!!! Hahahahahahahaha, isn't that funny? Well, we still didn't work it out, but if you could tell me some good tip that would be great."
--Kathryn, 8

"My two best friends are fighting because, for a couple of days, one of my friends didn't sit with us at lunch, and my other friend got really mad. Then she started to get jealous of my friend's boyfriend."
--Gaby, 11

"Me and my bf started to fight about her not hangin out with me. She hung out with her other friend, so we grew apart. Now her and her other friend always hang out and go shopping together. I feel left out. What should I do? Please help me!!!!"
--Bria, 9

"I need help. My best friend and I get into fights, like for small things. Last Friday, I said something that wasn't even serious. She got mad at me, and she knew that I was kidding. I never said sorry. I was mad because she knows that I always play around like that."
--Veronica, 12

"We fight about who has the cutest boy."
--Karen, 12

"My friend's name is Sari. She is nice, but when we get in a fight, she is mean. We always get in fights about things, like, if we want to make up a game, we think the other one makes the entire thing up. We work it out by looking at each other, because then we both laugh."
--Rebecca, 8

"Me and one of my best guy friends are in a fight. I thought we were really good friends, and he was going out with my bff, but when they broke up, he blamed the break up on me, like I told her 2 break up with him, but I didn't. He called me names, but I still want 2 be friends, but I don't know how to talk to him. Now what should I do?"
--Taylor, 11

"Why do my friends fight about the simplest things?"
--Manders, 9

"We fight about ignoring and not playing with each other."
--Caitlin, 11

"Me and my best friend, Lauren, have known each other since 1st grade. This year, my friend Adrienne started to say I hog Lauren. Me and Lauren always played soccer at recess with other kids, and ever since Adrienne met Lauren, she says that I only play because Lauren does. And she tells Lauren to run away from me, and she is always picking fights with me. I try not to fight/argue back, but I have to. Adrienne totally messed up Lauren's house with popcorn. She threw it everywhere. Her mom said she isn't allowed in her house anymore, and so did her grandmom. And all the time, when Adrienne is not around Lauren, she comes up to me and says, 'Do you want to go swimming?' But I know she is just using me for someone to hang out with. Now, we do not keep in touch. Well, we haven't for a while. Lauren heard that Adrienne was talking behind her back, and they are no longer friends. Lauren tries to ignore her as much as possible. Now I feel bad, but she did what she did - ruined our new yearbooks, talked behind our backs, and messed up Lauren's house."
--Stephanie, 11

"My friend is always going out with boys, and never pays attention to me anymore. One time, she said that she would invite me over, but then she got invited to her other friend's house, because she knew that a certain boy would be there. I feel like I don't fit in."
--Dana, 11

"I fight with my best bud, because she sometimes slaps me in the face, tells me to shut up, acts bossy, and is unfair. When she acts like this, what should I say or do?"
--Dena, 9

"Me and my friend fight about little stuff. Like, if I ask her if my crush likes me, she says maybe not, and I know that he does like me, so we fight."
--Angelica, 13

"My friend and I have known each other since preschool, and since I left in 3rd grade, she made a new friend named Marisa. And when I met her, I knew she was a bad girl. Well, 6/25/2002 I went online and I said, 'hey,' and she cussed at me, and I felt really bad that my best friend said that. Well, later that day, she instant messaged me, and said, 'What is your problem?' and I said, 'Nothing,' and then I said, 'What's up today?' Then she sent me emails - 'I really need help,' she said, 'Next year she will beat me up,' and I started to cry."
--Kristina , 12

"My friend, Emily, is mad at me, and she won't tell me what I did so we can work it out! What should I do? My other friend, Kayla, wants to be friends, but she has made me mad in the past, like, 5 other times! Should I be her friend, and what should I say to her?"
--Melissa, 12

"This boy is my friend, but he has been playing with other boys, and I think he forgot me. What should I do?"
--Caitlin, 9

"One of my best friends started to hang around a girl who loved to fight, punch, kick and pick on people. Ever since she started to hang around her, she always slaps and punches me if I don't do what she says. I tried to stand up to her and fight back, but she is very tall for her age, and, well, I am kind of short."
--Mariah, 11

"My best friend told me when I was 8 that she would never do anything to hurt me. Well, I was in for a surprise. I saw her hugging my boyfriend. I will never speak to her again!"
--Lexie, 11

"Today at day care we went to the pool and the park. When we were on the bus, Colette, this girl, said, 'I don't have anybody to sit with.' And she said that if they sit with her or if they're her friend, then she'd give them a dollar for a Coke. And I said, 'I'll sit with you,' and she said, 'No,' and went away. So when we got there, I was mad at her. Then we started fighting, and she gave three dollars away to these girls who are MY friends, and she bought them a Coke each. Then my best friend, Alex, started talking about me, then she rolled her eyes at me, and Cetashaya rolled her eyes back, so then Alex started thinking she was the cutest girl ever! What should I do about that?"
--Nicole, 8

"Whatever my friend does, I have to do it too, and if I don't do it, she says she is not my friend, so I do it. She already blurted out a secret, and I thought I could trust her, but I found out I cannot. So can you guys help me (or girls sorry)? Please help me. Oh I forgot that the people she told were also the people she told to pick on me, so can you help me? Thank you." --Courtney, 8

"Me and my best friend, Jenny, have been best friends for 3 years now. But ever since Kylie moved in, she broke up our friendship! And I was trying to tell her that I was not comfortable with our friendship, and that I was sad because she broke up Jenny and my friendship, and all of my other friendships!! What should I do?"
--Brinna, 8

"We fight about our other friends. Everyone liked Amber more. They didn't want to make her sad, so they only played with her. Now that she moved, everyone likes each other."
--Cassandra, 11

"Me and my best friend, Neeloo, got in fights every day this year. When I tried to talk to her about it, she walked away. So, I went home every day and called her. Then she listened. So I thought she was embarrassed to talk about it in front of our friends, and I was right. So now we're best friends again, and I think that if you are having my problem, then deal with it like I did!"
--Molly, 9

"We fight about ignoring each other, but we always say we're sorry."
--Destiny, 8

"Me and my friend are not friends anymore. When she was playing with her cousin, she told me so in front of my face! 'We are not friends anymore,' just like that. And later on, she gave me a note that said, 'I am sorry! Let's be friends again!' I don't have a reason to be her friend!"
--Donna, 9

"When me and my friends fight, we either work it out, talk about it, or have another friend come to me, and I tell them my problem, then she goes and tells the friend the things I said, then my friend tells what her problem is, and tells me."
--Miranda, 10

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