|Dealing With Anger: From The Mentors
What makes me angry? Mostly, people...when they do (what I think) are insensitive things. I hate when someone deliberately tries to make someone else feel bad, and especially people who hurt their friends. I have to admit that once, when I was really angry, I actually hit somebody. I regretted it afterwards, but not full heartedly because I think I was provoked in that situation. My most positive way of dealing with anger is verbalizing my frustration. I either talk to anyone who'll listen, or I'll write some thoughts down on paper (like a poem or something). Talking allows me to get another opinion on my problem and writing gives me a way to creatively get my frustrations out. Learning how to deal with anger as you're growing up is so important. When you're younger, you might yell, scream, or cry when you're angry. But as you get older, your problems become more serious and as an older person, you're expected to handle your aggression much better. Learning to control your aggression now will prevent you from doing something that you'll regret later on in life!
I get angry in class sometimes, when people are talking and being rude. I'm in class to learn, especially in college; when I'm paying for classes, I expect to be able to learn in a respectful environment. When I'm angry I like to write. I'll write down how I'm feeling to get it out and I've found that it not only helps, but when I've calmed down, I'm able to reflect back on that moment to see in retrospect just what I felt. I think it's important to learn how to deal with anger because if you don't, you might hurt someone close to you or yourself. You might just blow up at someone and say things that you really don't mean and might regret later.
There are many things that anger me, but through experience I've learned how to
deal with it. The one thing that really makes me angry is when I'm fighting with one of my friends. That's the worst, because I only want to be happy with my
friends. Once when I was in a fight with my best friend, I did something I now regret. I tried to bring him down and hurt his feelings, for the reason that I was feeling so hurt myself. The best way I've found to deal with anger is to take
a couple minutes, a few breaths, and just calm down. If you don't calm down, you could do things you regret. It's important to learn to deal with anger for so many reasons. The first one is that you'll deal with different things and people that make you angry throughout your whole life. If you learn how to deal, it will get
easier and easier over time and you won't have to worry about doing things you'll regret.
As pre-teens and teenagers, we get angry all the time, possibly because of
all the hormone changes in our bodies. We get all these rushes of
anger that we simply can't control, and very often, we just can't explain
why we are angry. When we can't manage our anger well, we say a lot of
mean things to our friends or siblings that really hurt their hearts. But being young is no excuse for letting your anger run riot. There are actually a lot of ways that can help you deal with anger. The simplest one is taking deep, deep breaths that will help you calm down. If that doesn't help, try to work out a little, stretch your muscles, go for a walk, swim, or jog. Sports are great stress relievers and help keep you from getting angry so easily.
There are a lot of things that can make me angry. I get mad at my friends if they don't listen to me, or if they don't think to invite me to something. I get angry with my brother over dumb things like who gets to use the computer, or if he is playing his music too loud. I also get very angry at my parents if they won't let me do something, such as go to a party or stay out late. When I become angry, I've found that the best way to deal with it is to first try to cool down. Maybe listen to some music, write in a journal, or talk to someone uninvolved about it. Once I am calm, I think it helps to talk to the person I am angry with. I tell them why I'm upset and what about the situation makes me angry. Sometimes I will still be angry with my friends, brother, or parents, but at least I have worked it out with them. I usually get over it by the next day. It is really important to deal with anger because it can lead to physical aggression or verbal abuse, or you could end up turning it onto others who aren't involved. It's better to deal with it then to hold onto it!
Anger is a very real thing in my life. People always get angry, some easier than others, but it is always an issue because it can make us do things that we may regret later. The best way for me to deal with anger, no matter what kind, is to just WAIT. I let whatever made me angry pass, and then I think about it for a few hours, or a day, and try to figure out what I can do to solve the problem. The worst thing to do is make a decision while you're angry, or act right away to quench your anger's thirst. The sooner the anger passes, the sooner you can think clearly and work towards solving the problem that made you angry.
Anger is a hard thing to deal with because often, finding the cause of your anger is really hard. Anger can overpower your life and force you to make decisions that you will regret later. Here are some of my favorite ways to handle anger without harming other people:
- Writing in a diary or journal
- Asking for or giving a hug
- Punching a pillow (because you can't hurt a pillow)
- Spend time doing something you like to do (draw, paint, dance, run...)
- Be alone and just yell and scream!
- Play a video game, watch television, read a book, listen to the radio
Copyright © 2005 CastleWorks, Inc. All rights reserved.