Dear IML,
I have a fear of talking in front of people. Even if it’s just a few people, I get nervous talking out loud in front of them. I get sweaty, and my heart beats so fast since English is not my first language. I can speak English fine, but I'm not confident enough to speak out loud because I might make a mistake in my pronunciation and my peers would laugh at me. What should I do to overcome this fear?
--Justin

Hi Justin,
I'm so amazed that you can speak two languages! That's really great, and as you get older you'll see how useful it is. A lot of people have the same fear as you do, and English IS their first language! Talking in front of people is a scary thing, and it's truly a talent. I used to be really shy, but I wanted to tour people around my school, so what I did was practice in front of the mirror A LOT! I would go over everything that I wanted to say and practice it until I felt comfortable. If you want to improve your English so that you feel more confident, I would suggest reading out loud. If you find the right book it's a lot of fun, and you can see how the characters talk. That way maybe a fun thing to do would be to repeat common phrases or lines from a book or even a movie or TV show. The more you talk out loud the better you'll get! Even though it's scary and people might judge you at first, the more you talk the better you'll get. My friend Annika is from Germany and when she came here she had to speak very slowly, but now she talks without an accent because she spoke with us so much! Good luck, I know you can do it!
--Stormie, IML Mentor

Dear Justin,
Public speaking can be really scary and nerveracking, especially if English is not your first language. I used to be scared of public speaking and would have the same symptoms as you: sweaty palms, fast heartbeat. However, after working through my fear, I now actually enjoy public speaking and have even won contests for it. The way I got over my fear was by taking baby steps. At first I would just practice in front of the mirror what I would say and and movements I would make. That way, I felt comfortable with the material I was covering. Also, I would practice in front of people such as my family members and friends. In this way, I became used to having an audience. Finally, I would first start speaking in front of small groups of people and then add people as time went by. I really hope it works out for you and remember that getting over a fear is a process.
--Joy, IML Mentor

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Dear IML,
I'm 12 and I'm still afraid or the dark!!!!!! But I'm mostly afraid of vampires. Whenever I'm left alone downstairs, my parents tell me to shut off everything. I turn off everything a little far from the stairs, then when I turn off the 2 final switches, I run up 13 steps just to get to the upstairs living room. Anyway, how should deal with my fear? PLEASE HELP!
--Julitza, 12

Dear Julitza,
As embarrassing as a fear of the dark is, I think it plagues a lot of people. In fact, I too still run to turn off the last lights! For me it's not really being afraid of the dark, it's just not being able to see things. And in terms of the vampires, well...I've faced that one too, only for me it was ghosts. The important thing to remember is that the dark is no different than the light. If you think about it, flipping off a switch won't make anything magically appear that wasn't there a second ago when the light was on. I just started turning off my light and looking around my room for a while. Just doing that every night for about a month made me accustomed to the dark, and confident that nothing spooky was there. Maybe if you try that, it could work for you too. Also, nightlights are always helpful. I have a friend who's 16 and a junior in high school who still needs a nightlight to feel safe, so don't worry about it!
--Stormie, IML Mentor

Dear Julitza,
Like you, I used to be afraid of the dark, especially when I was home alone. However, one night I just decided to turn off all the lights and slowly walked around the house and upstairs. Even though I was completely terrified, guess what? Everything turned out okay. Although that one night did not cure my fear of the dark, every night I did the same thing and every night it got just a little bit easier. Fears are extremely hard to conquer; however, with persistence, it is possible. Maybe you can do what I did. If you still do not feel comfortable with that, then maybe you can have a friend or a family member be with you the first couple of times. Also, try to talk to someone about your fears. I know that that may seem hard, but it can really make you feel a whole lot better. I hope you are feeling better about the dark soon!
--Joy, IML Mentor

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Dear IML,
I'm a real scaredy-cat. I am afraid of rides, mostly roller coasters. If my friend forces me to come on a ride that I'm really scared of, I cry before the ride starts and the guy operating the ride lets me off. At the end of the school year the school band is going to a rating festival in Pennsylvania, and afterwards we are going to Hershey Park. I hate 80% of the rides there, and I'm afraid people are going to make fun of me for refusing to go on most of the rides. Please help me! (If your advice has anything to do with going on the rides I'm scared of, I WON'T DO IT!)
--Alexandra, 10

Hi Alexandra!
Don't worry, I won't suggest that you go on rides you hate. Some people just do not like rides and never will. That means that there are others out there like you. I bet that there's another person in your band that doesn't like intense rides either. Try and find them, and then go together on the 20% of the rides you're okay with. Maybe you'll even get a new friend (or maybe a group of friends)! Everyone has fears they're insecure about, and hopefully the other students on the trip will respect that you are scared of roller coasters. Good luck!
--Lauren, IML Mentor

Okay Alexandra,
Let me just tell you that this comes at a perfect time for me. My cheerleading squad just went to Six Flags last weekend, and let me tell you, I’m not a roller coaster kind of girl. I was scared of the rides, and of missing out on all the fun. I waited in all the lines with my friends, ate lunch with them, and played games around the park. I do have to say that when they all came off of the rides I did feel a little left out, but only for a minute, and you know what, I actually found a roller coaster that I could bear to go on. When we got off, I was really proud of myself for facing my fears, but I wouldn’t go on any of the intense rides even after that. I don’t recommend putting yourself in an uncomfortable position, because it will ruin the day. Don’t do anything you don’t feel comfortable about just to fit in. I know that your friends will probably be trying to get you to go on rides, because they don’t want you to miss out either. If they tease you a bit just remember that they’re probably doing it just to try and help you make the best of your experience, not because they think you’re afraid. Believe me, I know that rides seem like the highlight of the trip, but if you take advantage of different activities you will most likely have a GREAT TIME. Good luck!
--Stormie, IML Mentor

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